blue artichoke

The worst vacation I ever took was to Jamaica with Black Cake. The trip soured before we even boarded the plane, as we were downgraded from a 5-star resort to a 3-star resort. We took one look at the place and began complaining loudly. Three stars were far too generous. Our room was tiny and smelly; our complaining earned us a room upgrade to a deluxe one with old coffee still in the coffeepot, dirty towels and a stinky bedspread that spread its stink throughout the room (I don’t even want to know…). The staff was surly, but the locals were dangerously aggressive. After being chased by a woman intent upon braiding our hair, we stuck close to the hotel where it was marginally safer (though the swarm of bees poolside could have messed us up almost as much as braids). The food that looked good enough to eat, wasn’t. I think we survived the week on Snickers bars. The only thing good about the trip was the company. So it was with trepidation that I approached this Wandering Gullet dinner. Actually, I started making it a week earlier, but the chicken I bought smelled funny and failed the Larry test (if Fat Larry turns his nose up at raw chicken, it’s probably bad). Even after rinsing and marinating it, I still smelled that weird chicken smell, so I threw the whole lot out. With new, fresher and better smelling chicken, I started over.

Jerk is a style of cooking meat, chicken in this case, but pork is also common, rubbed with a spicy-hot rub made of allspice and fiery Scotch bonnet peppers. Other spices and seasonings are often included, such as green onions, thyme, nutmeg, garlic, cloves and cinnamon, but the allspice and Scotch bonnet are mandatory. The meat is then cooked on pimento branches (from the allspice tree) over a pit. My jerk chicken was not quite authentic. I’m a chili-pepper pansy, so I used a serrano pepper, which though not as hot as a Scotch bonnet, still kicks my ass. Allspice tree-shrubs don’t grow in my yard, and if they did, I wouldn’t know. I cooked the chicken on metal grates over my gas grill. As a side dish/dessert, I mashed plantains with butter and coconut milk. Oh, sweet sister, was that good. (yes)

The chicken was much better than I anticipated. It would have made a better story if I had eaten the first batch of Jamaican Jerk Chicken and gotten food poisoning (take that, Jamaica!), or if I had hated the chicken, but it was good. Not good enough to make me want to go back to sample authentic Jamaican cuisine, or even to forget the worst vacation ever, but good enough to made me admit that perhaps, just maybe, Jamaica has some redeeming qualities for those of us who don’t particularly like reggae or smoke weed.

So, if you’re so inclined, turn up your Bob Marley album, fire up a doobie and munch on some jerk chicken. Don’t forget the plantains; they’re the best part of the meal. Yah, mon.

Jerk Chicken

For an even fierier dish, use additional habanero chiles with their seeds, or add a teaspoon or two of habanero hot sauce. Serve with sautéed okra and tomatoes.

Chicken:
1/3 cup diced yellow onion
1/4 cup finely chopped green onions
2 tablespoons cider vinegar
2 teaspoons brown sugar
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
3/4 teaspoon ground allspice
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
2 garlic cloves, chopped
1 habanero pepper, quartered
6 (6-ounce) skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
½ teaspoon salt
Cooking spray
Plantains:
2 soft black plantains (about 1 pound)
1/2 cup light coconut milk
1 tablespoon butter
1/4 teaspoon salt

To prepare chicken, combine first 10 ingredients in a food processor; pulse 30 times or until finely chopped. Spoon onion mixture into a large zip-top plastic bag. Add chicken to bag; seal. Marinate in refrigerator overnight, turning bag occasionally.

Prepare grill.

Remove chicken from bag; discard marinade. Sprinkle chicken with ½ teaspoon salt. Place chicken on a grill rack coated with cooking spray; grill 6 minutes on each side or until done.

To prepare plantains, peel plantains, and cut into 1-inch pieces. Cook plantains in boiling water 20 minutes or until tender; drain. Combine plantains, coconut milk, butter, and ¼ teaspoon salt in a medium bowl; mash to desired consistency. Place 1/3-cup plantain mixture on each of 6 plates, and top each serving with 1 chicken breast half.

Yield: 6 servings

CALORIES 276 (17% from fat); FAT 5.3g (sat 2.8g,mono 1g,poly 0.6g); PROTEIN 40.4g; CHOLESTEROL 104mg; CALCIUM 36mg; SODIUM 427mg; FIBER 1.8g; IRON 1.8mg; CARBOHYDRATE 14.9g
Cooking Light, MAY 2007